Growing Pains

This is the season for graduates – high school, kindergarten, college. It's a time to celebrate and recognize accomplishments. A formal transition – moving on to the next chapter of life, be it college or first grade.

My son recently celebrated his fifth grade graduation. For me, this celebration was bittersweet. On the one hand, I was so excited for my son – he successfully completed six years of elementary school. We made some lifelong friends along the way and have many wonderful memories. On the other hand, my baby is growing up! He's not going to need his mama quite like he used to. I know, I know – cut the strings already!

I've been here before. My daughter graduated from high school in 2005. I can't believe it's been 4 years! I still remember my own high school graduation. The feeling of freedom: no more school, no more books, no more teacher's dirty looks. Now I can do what I want to do! It was no different for her – that sense of freedom and no more rules. Reality was coming soon! But not before some growing pains – for both of us.

That summer after her graduation was a tough one for me. She didn't have to do what I said anymore – and although there were still rules at home, she was 18 and technically an adult. I wanted my daughter to learn from my mistakes. I'd been there, done that after all. I had big plans for her! She wasn't particularly interested in what I told her she should do. As a result, I learned to suggest certain things. For example: "What do you think about going to school close to home? Wouldn't that be smart – no rent?" Etc., etc. Basically, leading her in a way that was in line with my experience. (That approach worked, by the way, for any of you with new graduates!) The road to becoming an adult is paved with many choices. We all have decisions to make, big and small. In the process, we grow and learn.

I remember talking with my mom during this time and generally complaining that my daughter wasn't doing what I told her to do. She reminded me that I'm the person I am today because of the choices I made. The lessons I learned the hard way. The trials and tribulations we are all guaranteed. My daughter must learn from her own mistakes. Just like I did. It was during this summer that I was also reminded: God loves her even more than I do – and he has big plans for her too!

As my son prepares for middle school, I think of all the plans God has for him. How much He loves him – even more than I do. My son will make his share of mistakes and (hopefully!) learn from them. Like my daughter. Like myself. Like all of us.